A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks.
The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the
town and party with his old buddies.
So, he said to his new wife, 'Honey, I'll be right back.'
'Where are you going, coochy cooh?' asked the wife.
'I'm going to the pub, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer.'
The wife said, 'You want a beer, my love?' She opened the door to the
refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12
different countries: Germany,Holland, Japan, India, etc.
The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think
of saying was, 'Yes, lollypop...but at the pub...you know...they have frozen glasses...'
He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him
by saying, 'You want a frozen glass,puppy face?' She took a huge beer mug
out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said, 'Yes, tootsie roll, but at the
pub they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't
be long, I'll be right back. I promise. OK?'
'You want hors d'oeuvres, poochi pooh?' She opened the oven and took out 5
dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in
blankets, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.
'But my sweet honey... at the pub... you know... there's swearing,
dirty words and all that...'
'You want dirty words, d*ckhead? Drink your f*****g beer in your
goddamn frozen mug and eat your motherf*****g snacks, because you are
married now, and you aren't going anywhere! Got it, a*shole?'
.....and, they lived happily ever after.
