A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience.
She mounts the horse unassisted and the horse immediately springs into motion.
It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle.
In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip.
She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway.
The horse gallops along, seemingly impervious to its slipping rider.
Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety.
Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup, she is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground over and over.
As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere moments away from unconsciousness when to her great fortune...
the ASDA manager sees her and shuts the horse off.
A city dweller came to a farm and saw a beautiful horse.
He decided he had to have the animal.
He bargained with the farmer and the farmer finially sold him the horse.
The city man jumped on the horse and said, "Giddyup!" The horse didn't budge.
The farmer explained, "This is a special kind of horse.
He'll only move if you say, 'Praise the Lord.' To stop him, you have to say, 'Amen.'"
Keeping this in mind, the new owner yelled, "Praise the Lord!" whereupon the horse took off with great speed. Soon horse and rider were headed for a cliff.
Just in time the rider remembered to say "Amen!" The horse came to a screeching halt right at the edge of the cliff.
Relieved, the rider raised his eyes to heaven and exclaimed, "Praise the Lord!"
