3 white mice sitting at a bar all talking about how hard they are.
First one downs his whisky and says, "i'll tell you how hard i am, i went up to that huge god damned mouse trap and grabbed the cheese, the metal thing sprang down and missed me by a whisker"
The second white mouse sighs downs 2 shots and says "well i'll tell you I went to that same mouse trap after it had been reset, i grabbed the cheese and being that i am not as fast as u whap down it came on my back, it stung like a bas***d but i turned myself round and did 20 bench presses with the fooker then escaped.
The third white mouse sighs downs three shots gets up sticks on his little furry jacket and heads for the door, the other 2 mice shout hey where the hell do you think you are goin,
the third mouse with a flippant look over his shoulder "i'm going home to f*Ck the cat