How To Shower Like a Woman
>>
>> Take off clothes and place them sectioned in laundry basket according
>> to lights and darks.
>>
>> Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do
>> more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
>>
>> Get in the shower.
>>
>> Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and
>> pumice stone.
>>
>> Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added
>> vitamins.
>>
>> Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
>>
>> Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.
>>
>> Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until
>> red.
>>
>> Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
>>
>> Rinse conditioner off hair.
>>
>> Shave armpits and legs.
>>
>> Turn off shower.
>>
>> Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
>>
>> Spray mould spots with Tile cleaner.
>>
>> Get out of shower.
>>
>> Dry with towel the size of a small country.
>>
>> Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
>>
>> How To Shower Like a Man
>>
>> Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them
in
>> a pile.
>>
>> Walk naked to the bathroom.
>>
>> If you see wife/girlfriend along the way, shake willy at her making
the
>> 'woo-woo' sound.
>>
>> Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
>>
>> Admire the size of your willy and scratch your bum.
>>
>> Get in the shower.
>>
>> Wash your face.
>>
>> Wash your armpits.
>>
>> Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
>>
>> Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
>>
>> Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
>>
>> Wash your bum, leaving those coarse bum hairs stuck on the soap.
>>
>> Wash your hair.
>>
>> Make a shampoo mohawk.
>>
>> Wee.
>>
>> Rinse off and get out of shower.
>>
>> Partially dry off.
>>
>> Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of bath
>> the whole time.
>>
>> Admire willy size in mirror again.
>>
>> Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
>>
>> Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
>>
>> If you pass wife/girlfriend, pull off towel, shake willy at her and
>> make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
>>
>> Throw wet towel on bed.
