A ventriloquist goes into a pub in Wales and orders a pint.
At the bar is an old farmer with his dog by his side, so he nods & says hello.
The farmer returns the greeting quite amiably, so the ventriloquist thinks "I'll have some fun here!"
"Do you mind if I talk to your dog? he asks the farmer.
Looking puzzled, the farmer replies "please do, but he won't talk back".
The ventriloquist bends down & says "hello doggie, how does this guy treat you?"
"not bad, he feeds me every day & takes me to the pub. Can't complain" he answers himself on behalf of the dog.
The farmer looks a little puzzled, & has another pint.
"is that your horse outside?" asks the ventriloquist.
"Yes, but he doesn't speak either" replies the farmer.
The ventriloquist goes to the window & says to the horse "Hello, does he look after you?"
"oh yes, he grooms me regularly & keeps me well shod" he answers himself on behalf of the horse.
The farmer is now totally confused, & has another drink.
"is that your sheep outside?" asks the ventriloquist.
"yes, but you can't speak to it, that sheep's a fucking liar!" replies the farmer, very quickly.